"Real men don't cook"
How many times have you heard that before? Recently, a colleague of mine stated this in response to a request from a member of the fairer sex for a home made cake. Even after much cajoling and jokes about giving her “a good muffin’”, he still wouldn’t do it. Now, whilst I have some sympathy with his position, I feel a small correction is required. The correct statement is “Men shouldn’t need to cook.” After all, what’s the point in keeping a dog and barking yourself? We all know men are the best chefs. Just look at all the best chefs in the world and the truth of that statement is apparent. However, men who have a female partner (just in case) shouldn’t need to cook. It is clearly women’s work, but this doesn’t mean that for special occasions, a man can’t cook.
Having said all the above, we must also investigate other character traits of said person. Listening to Craig David is a poor sign. I know Craig comes from the same locality and therefore is a “local boy”, but that shouldn’t require you to undergo purgatory every day.
Excessive spending on high-tech equipment is also worrying. This applies to most areas, but especially music playing devices and telephones. This shows a worrying ability to ‘shop for England’, which accompanied by a propensity to spend hours and hours on your mobile phone is worryingly feminine.
Finally, and potentially the clincher, is all the fuss being made about baking a cake. Rather than maintain this position in the face of such pressure, surely any sensible person who just comply and finish it. In the long run, much easier. A person refusing to comply against all reason normally suggests they are trying to hide something. Perhaps in this case, the person in question is actually very good at baking cakes, but wouldn’t want to admit it.
So, what does all the above evidence indicate? All the above behavioural traits are indicative of a strongly developed feminine side. So, perhaps his new saying should be:-
“I’m a lady, don’t you know’.
And, he should be baking the cakes?
posted by Sam Getsalot @ Thursday, January 26, 2006
6 Comments:
So enjoying cooking makes you like bum sex with men?
Hmmm, I'm sorry but I can't see the link?
Erm. When did I say that?
Perhaps the point that dave is missing is not that sam is saying he's a up-hill gardener because he bakes, but that he's slowly turning into a lady and will soon be using moisturiser and handcream.
This raises the further question of is metrosexual just another word for blokes becoming camper and becoming no more than chicks with the ability to read a map?
Good point. I think the critical point here is not the ability to perform a function, but the desire to do it. As I said, men are clearly better at cooking, but if men were meant to cook, we would have been given tits. If what people do is determined by their abilities, what would women do all day long?
If what people do is determined by their abilities, what would women do all day long? Ooo - controversial!
Well, I don't wish to look too deeply into your personal life, but I can think of at least one thing that I would prefer doing with a woman!!
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