Phone Competitions

Today, the BBC has suspended all further phone competitions from it’s programs. I’m forever surprised by these appalling excuses for entertainment and even more appalled by the people why actually phone up.

What in gods name do these mindless degenerates think they are doing? When the question is ‘What’s 1+1’ and the answers are a) Infinity, b) 2 and c) 0, do the respondents really think they might be the only ones to know the answer? Or, do they think they are amongst the relatively small percentage who do? Do these feeble brained excuses for humanity not realise that ever other feeble brained moron will also be phoning up believing they are the only person clever enough to answer the question?

When the above happens, the television company is delighted. Most of the population of Newcastle, Liverpool and Moss Side have called, a tidy sum has been made in profit and all those who should be very angry are actually so dim, they don’t actually realise how stupid they are. One should really question whether these people can be classified as human beings. They can’t be self-aware as if they were, they wouldn’t fall for this.

Well, I’ve got a great solution. Let’s get all the phone numbers of those who call, get their addresses and then pay them a visit. A quick 9mm round into the brain and we can put them out of my misery. In a short time, nobody will be left to enter the competitions, which will then cease. As sideline benefits, most theft in the country will have ended due to the eradication of the population of Liverpool, an extremely annoying accent will have been erases (Newcastle done) and Manchester will become a safe city. Additionally, house prices will come under control as the spare houses hit the market.

Everyone’s a winner!!